Renaissance writers compared the proper relationship between wife and husband to that of a magistrate carrying out the orders of a higher official, in a social relationship reflecting the political hierarchy of the state. Men were in charge of families and could beat, starve, or otherwise abuse their wife as well as their children. This is not to say that most husbands did so, but that the legal system allowed such behavior. Church authorities were the only recourse for an abused wife. A priest could shame an abusive or adulterous husband in cases in which the state would do nothing. Although being sinful was not necessarily illegal, such behavior could be condemned by the congregation and community. Households usually consisted of a nuclear family having a few surviving children, especially in urban centers. Rural families with estates of any size might have a more extended network of relatives to help run the farm. Because the normal life expectancy was approximately 40 years, relatively few grandparents lived for any length of time in the houses of their sons or daughters. People married relatively late, considering how quickly they died. Most couples in a first marriage were fairly close in age, the wife usually younger. Young women of 14 or 15 sometimes married much older men, however, partly as a result of the plagues of the 14th century, when the population balance was destroyed. In most Renaissance societies, such a May/December couple was viewed as inappropriate and would have been subjected to a raucous charivari (see later discussion) on the first night of their marriage.
WIDOWHOOD
Widows who functioned as the head of a household were the only secular women considered to be adults, and they held an ambiguous position in society. On the one hand they commanded respect because of their station; on the other hand they sometimes were the subject of suspicion because they had been sexually active. Widows outnumbered widowers by far because women were somewhat younger than their husband. Young widows almost always remarried, but older widows, especially those at the cusp of childbearing years, often did not. Their widowhood was the first time in their life when they experienced independence, and those with money had no need to remarry. In some regions a widow had to forfeit a percentage of her husband’s estate if she remarried. Children were the property of their father but not of their mother in most countries on the Continent. A widow was not necessarily allowed to keep her children if powerful male relatives of her husband intervened. The marriage contracts of some couples specifically named the wife as guardian of any children and of the estate to protect the woman’s rights should her husband predecease her. Poverty-stricken widows were cared for by family members or by charitable organizations.
Handbook to Life in Renaissance Europe
Except for young women whose family lived in poverty, brides were expected to bring a dowry to the marriage. In most cases, the dowry signified all the property that a woman might expect as an inheritance from her father’s estate. Her husband managed the money or property and actually owned it, but the bride was usually entitled to have the dowry returned if the marriage was annulled. Betrothal was a solemn vow, as binding as the marriage vow. Announced in public, often at the door of a church and in the presence of a priest, the betrothal could be broken only if both parties agreed. Betrothed couples occasionally had sexual intercourse, which legally bound them as if they were already officially married. Because of the confusion between the betrothal ceremony and the wedding, formal betrothals were discouraged during the 16th century. Subsequently the actual wedding ceremony began to assume more significance. Marriage was (and is) a sacrament in the Catholic Church, but between two individuals rather than between an individual and a priest. According to the Council of Trent a marriage was valid if vows were spoken before a priest and witnesses. Parental consent (i. e., from the fathers) was not required for Catholics, but most Protestant sects did require permission.
SEXUAL ADVICE AND ACTIVITY
Advice concerning sexual activity abounded during the Renaissance, some of it from ancient Greek sources. This advice was meant for married couples because only they were supposed to be having sexual intercourse. An impressive percentage of these texts pertained to fertility and conception, and much of the information was quite specific, such as the advice to tie a string around the left testicle in order to conceive a male child. Although married partners were not expected to exult in sexual activity—such sentiment would have been “lustful”—the satisfaction of sexual urges was assumed to be part of a married couple’s obligation to each other. Some writers, such as the Florentine preacher Girolamo Savonarola (1452-98), agreed with the ancient Greek physician Galen that the wife had to reach orgasm in order to conceive. (Rape was never supposed to result in pregnancy. A raped women who conceived was assumed to have enjoyed the act and had no means of punishing her attacker.)
Moderation was the keyword, as newlyweds were cautioned to drink sweet wine and chicken soup, rest more, and save their strength. Sperm was thought to be more potent if a man abstained from sexual activity for a time. Older men who wished to impregnate their wife were advised to use the 40 days of Lent to store sperm and enhance its power. Abstention was required not only during Lent, but also on Sundays, religious feast days, and three days before and after receiving Holy Communion. Men were requested by priests to respect the wishes of a wife who wanted to take Communion, even if she chose to do so several times a year. Abstention was also suggested during pregnancy, breast-feeding, and menstruation. Some people had a very interesting sex life: The prohibitions against having intercourse in public or in church must have been enacted because such behavior had been observed.
Adultery was a very serious offense, at all levels of society. Offenders were sometimes forced to sit in church, wrapped in a white sheet or wearing other signs of shame. An adulterous woman might have her head shaved or her clothing torn. Members of guilds who were married, especially in northern Europe, were subject to expulsion if they were known to have committed adultery. Dishonoring the marriage vows was said to dishonor the guild, but having one less member in a guild also reduced the competition for available work. In addition a man would usually be expelled from the guild if his wife committed adultery and he continued to cohabit with her. In general the adultery of a wife was viewed as a much more serious offense than a husband’s philandering. If a husband caught his wife in the act and killed her, usually he would not be punished.
World History
