Marriage served two main functions in ancient Greece: the creation of family alliances and the production of legitimate children. Although romances from as early as the Hellenistic period do narrate tales of young lovers who overcome any number of obstacles to marry and be together, love was not the usual basis for marriage.
To date, scholars have no information regarding marriage or weddings in Bronze Age Greece. Some have interpreted the festive flotilla fresco from Thera as a wedding procession, but there is no clear evidence for this. We know that women were the primary caregivers for children as mentioned in the Linear B texts, but these texts deal mainly with palatial affairs, not the daily lives of "housewives," so we know little about the workings of Mycenaean marriages.
We learn more about marriage during the Dark Age and Archaic Age through Homer and Hesiod. Much can be gleaned from a short passage in Book 9 of the Iliad (ll. 144-148). Agamemnon, attempting to assuage Achilles's wrath, makes the following offer:
There are three daughters of mine in the well-built hall,
Khrysothemis and Laodike and Iphianassa,
Of them let him lead her whom he wishes without bride-price
To the house of Peleus. And I will give as dowry
Many things, as many as never before anyone gave with his daughter.
What is first evident is that the father has the right to marry off the daughter, without either her or her mother's consent. As in later Greek history, marriage arrangements were conducted between either the groom or his family and the bride's kyrios, or legal guardian. Usually this was her father, although in his absence it could be a brother, or even a son.
Two financial transactions were involved in marriages: the bride price and the dowry. In contrast to later understandings of these, both transactions ultimately benefited the wife. The bride price consisted of goods offered by the groom or his family to the bride and her family. Such a tradition recognized the value of daughters to their families, especially their economic contribu-
Tions vis-a-vis textiles and labor; the groom's family had to "buy" her from her parents. The bride price might also include presents to the intended bride herself, especially if she were in high demand. In Book 18, 291-300, of the Odyssey, Penelope, one of Greek tradition's most sought-after wives, reminded her suitors of their obligations and got some lovely jewelry.
Somewhat the opposite of the bride price, the dowry was property given by the bride's family into the keeping of the groom. In reality, the dowry was the bride's inheritance from her natal family, usually around one-half or one-third of each of her brothers' portions, although she received it upon marriage rather than the death of her father. Laws varied throughout the poleis concerning what property could be included in a dowry. For example, land was acceptable in Sparta, but categorically not so in Athens. In the story quoted above, Agamemnon includes copious tracts of land as dowry for whatever daughter Achilles would choose to marry, indicating that land was transferable as dowry in Homer's world.
Although technically the husband had use of the dowry while married to his wife, the dowry actually belonged to her and her natal family. If the marriage were ended for any reason other than the wife's infidelity (and sometimes not even then), her entire dowry had to be restored to her or her family. This helped to prevent "frivolous" divorces. Furthermore, the wife continued to have use of her dowry after the death of her husband, providing her with a type of life insurance. Upon her death, she left her dowry to her children. In this way, some inheritance went through the female line as well as the male's. Typically, the bride who offered the largest dowry had a greater share of suitors, and poorer families could find the dowry a heinous burden on family resources, especially as the father had to produce it while still alive (in contrast to his sons' inheritance). The dowry has continued in use even into the present day in Greece (although since the 1980s it has technically been illegal). The bride price was more restricted in use.
Hesiod, more "working-class" in his concerns than Homer, strongly advises the listener against getting a bad wife while offering advice on how to get a good one in his Works & Days (ll. 695-705):
Lead a wife to your home when you are of age, neither much less than 30 years
Nor much more, this being the appropriate age to wed.
And let the woman be four years from youth; marry her in the fifth.
Marry a virgin, so you might teach her good ways.
Best of all to marry someone who lives near you,
Having looked all about, so your marriage is not a joke to the neighbors.
For a man acquires nothing better than a wife of the good sort, but nothing's worse than the bad kind, a parasite!
As discussed below, many Greeks took Hesiod's advice. Greek men generally married at around age thirty, when their own fathers might be near death, thus releasing the family land for inheritance. Women—girls, really—married
For the first time while in their teens. In Sparta, this was seldom younger than age eighteen, when women were considered to be better able to bear children. In Athens, the more common age was fifteen, although in the fourth century b. c.e., girls could be married as young as thirteen. Men generally preferred virgins as their first wives, so as to ensure the paternity of their children. However, both divorced and widowed women could and did remarry, so female virginity was hardly a prerequisite for marriage.
Athens. As is typical for ancient Greece, the two regions we know the most about concerning weddings and marriage are Athens and Sparta. Athens was certainly the more traditional of the two, and it might be accepted as the template for weddings in other Greek poleis. The full affair was composed of three basic parts: the betrothal (engye), the giving away of the bride (ekdosis), and the union (gamos). As was customary, the betrothal was made between the bride's kyrios and either the bridegroom himself or his family, "for the ploughing of legitimate children" (Menander). The dowry, dependent on the bride's family's assets, would be established at this time (Rehm 1994, 2-18).
The actual wedding ceremony commenced before the ekdosis. Both families would preside over preliminary sacrifices in honor of the event and to reaffirm the familial unit. The bride herself would make offerings to different deities such as Hera, goddess of marriage, and Aphrodite, goddess of sex. But most importantly, she made offerings to Artemis, including childhood toys and a lock of her own hair specially grown for this occasion. Artemis protected the girl as a child, and it was she who would preside over the bride during defloration and childbirth (see chapter 8).
On the day of the wedding, both bride and groom would take a ritual bath. In Athens, the water was brought from the Kallirrhoe ("fair flowing") Spring in special vases called loutrophoroi—"bath water carriers." Both bride and groom would then be decked out in their finest clothing and crowned with garlands. The bride also wore a veil. The groom and his family arrived at the house of the bride for a banquet, probably also involving a number of smallish sacrifices and libations. From here, the groom took the bride by the wrist and led her out of her paternal home to bring her to his own. If circumstances allowed, they would ride there on a cart; if not, it was customary to ride a mule. (If a man married the girl next door, he could probably just walk his bride to their new home.) This leading out by the wrist formally constituted the ekdosis.
At the groom's house, the couple was greeted at the door by the groom's mother, who led them to the hearth, where they were showered with seeds, dried fruits, and candies (much like the modern throwing of rice). This act performed two functions. First, the hearth, domain of the goddess Hestia, was where new people were ritually inducted into the family; newborn babies were also brought to the hearth to make them family members. Second, the shower of fruits and seeds had fertility connotations. It may have been at this point that the bride removed her veil, the anakalypteria, thus formally giving herself to her new husband.
Finally, the couple went to bed to consummate the marriage—the gamos itself. The next day, friends and family came by to visit, to sing wedding songs,
And to give wedding gifts. From this point forth, the bride lived with her husband's household and produced his heirs (Rehm 1994, 12-18).
Sparta. The Spartans believed that the purpose of marriage was the production of children, although they were somewhat less concerned than the Athenians about the "legitimate" aspect: What was important was the creation of good soldiers. Because they believed that good soldiers could be only produced by healthy and strong mothers, Spartan girls did not marry until they were around eighteen years old, in contrast to the Athenian brides. It also appears that the bridegrooms in Sparta were not much older than the brides, probably in their mid-twenties, meaning that there was far less of an age gap between Spartan couples.
Much of what we know about the Spartan marriage ritual(s) comes from Xenophon and Plutarch, two authors quite removed from the time and/or place about which they were writing. As such, the accuracy of either of their descriptions is debatable. Nevertheless, from what researchers can tell, the Spartans seem to have practiced what to modern Westerners would seem a rather bizarre wedding rite. According to Plutarch (Lycurgus 15.3-4), "They married through seizure, not when the bride was small or underage for marriage, but being at the peak of youth and ready. After she was seized the so-called bride's-maid took charge of her, cropping her hair to the skin, dressing her in a man's cloak and shoes, and then laying her on a mat alone in the dark. The bridegroom, neither drunk nor enfeebled, but sober like always, having dined in the mess hall, slips in and loosens her belt, lifts her and carries her to the bed. Having spent a short time together he leaves in an orderly fashion, returning to his usual place and sleeping among the other young men."
So long as the man was stationed with his troop (see above, the section about age), the marriage was carried on in secret, the man sneaking away whenever possible to tryst with his wife, then returning to the barracks. The marriage was officially proclaimed once the woman became pregnant. In this way, a couple could be certain they were fertile before establishing a formal marriage. Only when the man was discharged from constant active duty around age thirty did he and his wife share a house (until this point, the bride remained in her parents' house), and Plutarch remarks that some couples had several children before getting to see each other face-to-face in daylight! However, the fact that Spartan girls practiced athletics, in the nude even, outdoors alongside the boys makes it unlikely that any Spartan couple had not seen each other before the wedding, indicating some possible misconceptions on the part of Plutarch.
In contrast to the other Greeks, the Spartans exhibited a remarkable lack of concern with either virginity or marital fidelity. The fact that a marriage was only made official once a couple produced a child (or a pregnancy, at least) suggests that some couples who did not conceive moved on to try other partners. Furthermore, Xenophon tells us that wife-sharing was common among Spartans, whereby a husband might lend his wife to another man for the production of healthy children. More likely than not (Pomeroy 2002, 37-39), the wives had a considerable say in these "spouse-swapping" arrangements. Both
Of these differences from the other Greeks might be attributed to the Spartan obsession with having a large, powerful army, but another factor was the Spartan system of landownership and inheritance.
It is generally understood that before the end of the fifth century b. c.e., the Spartans had two types of landholdings, one type that belonged to an individual family (private property), and one type that belonged to the state and was apportioned out to citizen males in exchange for military service. As all citizen males were guaranteed a chunk of land, the concern with the inheritance of private property was less rigorous, thus less concern with the parentage of children. This notion has recently been severely challenged by historians such as Hodkinson, who argues that there were actually two types of private property, one of which was called the ancient portion. There were some laws regulating what the owner could do with his land—for example, he could not sell any of the ancient portion—but he could bequeath any of his land as he saw fit (Hodkinson 2002, 88). Thus, the landowner could distribute his land as he chose; he was not obliged to pass on his property to his sons. Furthermore, women had, for Greece, extraordinary property rights themselves, so that passing land and possessions through the female line was common. Without the strict need for father-son inheritance, marriage, sexuality, and reproduction were more casual in Sparta than in many of the other Greek poleis. The only exception to this rule was the Spartan royal family, wherein adultery of women could be quite scandalous. Once again, this was not because of inheritance issues, but rather for the royal bloodline: Spartan kings had to be legitimate members of the royal families (Pomeroy 2002, 73-74).
Hellenistic Egypt. In the Hellenistic period, women attained far more power, especially economic rights, than they had held in the Classical period. This is especially evident in the marriage contracts that accompanied Hellenistic marriages. Many of these documents were preserved in Egypt because of the dry climate. A contract that sheds considerable light on Hellenistic marriages is the one between Heraklides and Demetria of Cos, who wed in 311 b. c.e. According to this document:
Heraklides takes as his lawful wife Demetria of Cos from her father Leptines of Cos and her mother Philotis. He is free; she is free. She brings with her to the marriage clothing and ornaments valued at 1000 drachmai. Heraklides shall supply to Deme-tria all that is suitable for a freeborn wife. We shall live together in whatever place seems best to Leptines and Heraklides, deciding together.
If Demetria is caught in fraudulent machinations to the disgrace of her husband, she shall forfeit all that she has brought with her. But Heraklides shall prove whatever he charges against Demetria before three men whom they both approve. It shall not be lawful for Heraklides to bring home another woman for himself in such a way as to inflict contumely on Demetria, nor to have children by another woman, nor to indulge in fraudulent machinations against Demetria on any pretext. If Heraklides is caught doing any of these things, and Demetria proves it before three men whom they both approve, Heraklides shall return to Demetria the dowry of 1000 drachmai
Which she brought, and also forfeit 1000 drachmai of silver coinage. . . . (Translation, Pomeroy 1975, 127-128)
It is evident that some previous ideas about marriage were still maintained in the Hellenistic period. The bride was given away by her father as before, although now we note that Demetria's mother is also mentioned. A dowry (but no bride price) is documented, and it was Heraklides and Leptines who decided where the new couple would live. Furthermore, as per tradition, the dowry belonged to Demetria; if there were a divorce for any reason other than her adultery, she would take her dowry with her. Somewhat new is the contract itself. Even more so are the stipulations placed upon Heraklides. In a classical Greek marriage, there was little evidence that a wife, especially one of the middle or lower classes, had any redress against a husband's philanderings. Here, not only is Heraklides expressly forbidden to engage in any relationship with a woman not approved by his wife, but, failing that, upon their divorce he must pay a 100 percent surcharge to her dowry. Similar contracts existed throughout the Hellenistic period, especially in Egypt.
Heiresses. Normally in ancient Greece, inheritance went from father to son, especially as far as land and buildings were concerned. A secondary line of inheritance went through women by means of their dowries (see above). What happened, then, if a family had no sons to inherit their property? In the absence of any children at all—a rare occurrence in Greece—a man's estate was divided up among his closest relatives on his father's side, keeping the patrimony within the paternal unit. It was far more common, however, that a couple had at least one daughter, and the patrimony would "travel" through her. There were different names for such a girl throughout Greece. In Athens she was an epikleros, meaning "attached to the family property." In Sparta she was called a patroukhos; in Gortyn, a Doric community like Sparta, she was the patroiokos—"of the father's house." In all cases, the idea was to have the heiress marry her closest male relative on her father's side. Her children, then, would inherit the paternal estate from the grandfather.
The legal procedures regarding heiresses varied from city to city, with some of the harshest laws existing in Athens, as we know through the court cases of Isaios and Demosthenes. According to Athenian law, an epikleros was obliged to marry her closest male relative on her father's side. The order of preferable spouses was firmly set: first paternal uncles, then first cousins who were sons of paternal uncles, then first cousins who were sons of paternal aunts. There was some room for maneuvering on the part of the potential grooms; if they did not wish to marry the epikleros, they could pass her on to the next relative, possibly being obliged to provide her with a dowry if the girl were poor.
The epikleros herself, however, had no say in the matter whatsoever, even if she was already married. That is to say, if a family lost its sons and was left with only a daughter who was already married, she was forcibly divorced from her husband and married to the appropriate paternal relative. Isaios (3.64) claimed in the fourth century: "many men who have already been living with their
Wives have been deprived of them thus." As for the (new) husband, his role in the continuation of the paternal line was highly valued. Husbands of epikleroi were legally obliged to have sex with their wives at least three times a month, and they were released from military duties to fulfill their obligations. (In other words, a man could explain to the authorities that he could not be sent to war because he legally had to stay home to have sex with his first cousin.)
The laws concerning heiresses in other parts of Greece were less severe, as we can determine from the Gortyn law code (see chapter 7). Section vii.15 of this code relates:
The heiress is to marry the oldest of her father's living brothers. If her father has no living brothers but there are sons of the brothers, she is to marry the oldest brother's son. . . . If the heiress is too young to marry, she is to have the house, if there is one, and the groom-elect is to have half of the revenue from everything. If he does not wish to marry her as prescribed by law, the heiress is to take all the property and marry the next one in succession, if there is one. If there is no one, she may marry whomever she wishes of those who ask her from the same phratry (see above). If the heiress is of age and does not wish to marry the intended bridegroom, or the intended is too young and the heiress is unwilling to wait, she is to have the house, if there is one in the city, and whatever is in the house, and taking half of the remaining property she is to marry another of those from the phratry who ask her, but she is to give a share of the property to the [rejected] groom. If there are no kinsmen as defined for the heiress, she is to take all the property and marry from the phratry whomever she wishes. (Translation from Lefkowitz and Fant 1992, adapted)
Although there was obviously some attempt here to have the heiress marry within the paternal family, this was not strictly enforced. The girl could "buy" out of her obligations by renouncing a percentage of her inheritance to a possible claimant rather than marrying him. And in other respects, she could marry "whomever she wishes," indicating a fair amount of autonomy for girls from Gortyn. Something similar seems to have been practiced in Sparta. According to Herodotus, Spartan kings had the right to pick husbands for heiresses; or a father, knowing he was going to die, could "bequeath" his daughter(s) to a preferred groom. But by the Late Classical period, Spartan women were more or less able to decide for themselves whom they would marry. As women could own land and resources in Sparta, inheritance of the paternal estate through the female line was legitimate and uncomplicated (Pomeroy 2002, 84-86).
Sex
Like gender, sex is a cultural construct, with different societies understanding aspects of sex and sexuality in different ways. This becomes especially evident when studying the ancient Greeks. The usual assumption is that the Greeks had a lot of homosexuality in their society. The word lesbian, in fact, derives from the supposed homosexual inclinations of Sappho and her "girls," who lived on the island of Lesbos.
In reality, the ancient Greeks did not have our concepts of homo - and hetero-
Sexuality; they saw all people as being essentially bisexual. Their delineation of human sexuality distinguished between the dominator/penetrator and the submissive/penetratee. In all heterosexual unions, the male was (as they chose to understand it) the penetrator, the woman the penetratee. For homosexual unions, there were different sets of rules governing the relationship between two males, and the specifics of Greek female-female unions are still a matter of debate among researchers.
Heterosexual Unions. For "proper" women, heterosexual sex took place exclusively with one's husband, although adultery was a reality in ancient times just as now. Men had a bit more freedom; neither virginity before nor fidelity during marriage was demanded of them (at least until the Hellenistic period). This, of course, leads to an obvious paradox: If girls are not supposed to have sex but boys can, with whom are the boys having sex? "With other boys" was part of the answer, especially in certain communities. But another part was the traffic in female sex workers in ancient Greece. Men of affluence could afford hetairai (sing. hetaira). The word technically means "female companion," although a closer definition in English might be "courtesan" or "call girl." These were the upper-class sex workers, who set their own hours and booked their own clients. At the opposite end of the spectrum were the pornai (sing. porne), literally "whores," usually slaves who worked in brothels for a madam. Somewhere in between were flute-girls, semitrained musicians who entertained at parties such as the symposia and who often had sex with their clients.
Same-Sex Unions. Sex got complicated between males. It was thought by the Greeks that men were dominant sexually, meaning they were the penetrators. This was not too much of a problem with heterosexual intercourse, but was definitely problematic with homosexual ones, as, inevitably, one of the males had to play the feminizing role of the penetratee. As this could be a source of extreme shame in ancient Greece, there were rules governing what kind of males men could be attracted to, and how these relationships might unfold. As with everything else in Greece, these rules differed from polis to polis.
In Athens, the "norm" was that older men might fall in love with youths, youths usually being defined as before the first whiskers appeared on the chin. Depending on when body hair started to appear, this probably indicated boys sixteen to nineteen years old. Boys at this age were not yet entirely masculinized, so assuming a passive role in a love affair was not as shameful for them. Older men, then, felt/expressed attraction for younger men; even Socrates, the supposed bastion of self-restraint, claimed that he got "hot" looking down the robes of the handsome youth Kharmenides. In these relationships, the dominant, older male was called the erastes, literally "lover." The object of his affections was the eromenos, literally "beloved."
Such crushes, as we might call them, were expressed quite openly. In art, a lover might have the name of his beloved painted on a vessel, accompanied by the word kalos ("beautiful"). More demonstrative were scenes of actual courtship, in which the erastes would offer the young eromenos tokens of his
Affection, such as a hare, sometimes pointing to the young man's genitalia (the Greeks were not big on subtlety). One of the most famous literary examples of the erastes-eromenos relationship (although not an especially successful one) appears in Plato's Symposion. Here, the playboy of Athens—Alcibiades—sees Socrates reclining on his kline (couch). In a twist of the usual older man-pred-ator/younger man-prey scenario, it becomes clear that Alcibiades has turned the tables on his erastes (213 c-e): "Socrates: Agathon [the host], see if you might protect me, as the love of this man for me is no trivial matter! For since that time when I fell in love with him, it hasn't been possible for me to look at or chat with any handsome fellow, as he being jealous has fits of envy and abuse, and he hardly keeps his hands off me! ... His mania and violent sexuality have me scared off my ass!"
Usually, though, younger fellows were not supposed to be quite so openly amorous. It was seen as an honor to receive the attentions of a distinguished man (like Socrates), but not necessarily to be dominated/penetrated by one. The crush on the young boy either was intended to remain sexually unfulfilled or a less penetrating form of sex was preferred. Vase paintings suggest that in-tercrurial sex (between the thighs) was common. What was typical from the Socrates-Alcibiades scene was the location: Symposia were venues for flirtation and erotic contact between not only men and the flute-girls, but also between men and boys. An even more common trysting space was the palaistra, what we might call a health club or sports club. Here, males exercised in the nude (the Greek word gymno = to strip naked, thus the gymnasium was where people stripped naked to exercise), giving them a wonderful opportunity to see each other, perform for each other, and express varying degrees of admiration.
In Doric areas like Sparta and Crete, male homosexuality was less stress-inducing and may actually have been part of a boy's education. The fourth-century b. c.e. author Ephoros relates that in Crete, it was customary for an older erastes to take a fancy to a younger eromenos. The erastes would inform the eromenos's family of his intentions; if they approved, he would "kidnap" the object of his affections. The erastes then took the boy out to the country for two months, where they camped and slept together while the older man educated the younger. At the end of the two months, the lover returned the beloved home with many fine gifts, including clothing (Dover 1989, 189-190). This type of relationship may be what is represented artistically in the lead figurines from the Cretan sanctuary of Kato Symi Viannou, where pairs of hunters of different ages are shown (see Image 6.3).
There is no clear evidence for similar customs in Sparta, but much classical Athenian literature ascribes strong homoerotic inclinations to the Spartans, with expressions such as "doing it Spartan-style" referring to anal intercourse. Amusingly, this expression applies to both homosexual and heterosexual unions (Dover 1989, 187-188). Other pieces of evidence have also been put forward to explain Spartans' connection with homosexuality. Xenophon and Plutarch, when describing Spartan marriage customs (see above), mention that Spartan brides were dressed as men for their wedding night, even shaving their heads. This ritual transvestitism may have been intended to comfort the
6.3 Kato Symi Hunters Figurine (Courtesy of Paul Butler)
Bridegroom in his transition from homoerotic to heteroerotic sexuality. Furthermore, the fact that Spartan males spent the first thirty years of their lives living mainly in the company of other men in their barracks has led some to suggest that in such an all-male, military situation, homosexual liaisons between boys and men should be expected.
Two other places where male-male homoeroticism was considered common
Were Elis and Boiotia, in central Greece. Xenophon, in his Constitution of the Lakedaimonians, says, "In other Greek states, for instance among the Boiotians, man and boy live together, like married people; elsewhere, among the Eleans, for example, consent is won by means of favors" (2.13). Both Xenophon and Plutarch stated that in Elis and Thebes (the capital of Boiotia) the strongest military units were composed of pairs of homosexual lovers, all of whom would want to impress each other on the battlefield and who would be willing to die for each other. The epitome of this sentiment was the Theban Sacred Band, established around 380 b. c.e. and composed exclusively of pairs of homosexual lovers (see below) (Dover 1989, 192).
Researchers know far less about female homosexual relations than they would like, as is true for most aspects of women's lives in ancient Greece. Fewer than twenty pages of Sir Kenneth Dover's book Greek Homosexuality (Dover 1989) are dedicated to lesbianism, with the majority of that focusing on Sappho's poetry (see chapter 10).
One cannot deny, though, that Sappho is one of our best early sources for female homoeroticism. In reality, not all of her poetry (all but one poem existing exclusively as fragments) can be understood as referring to the first person. That is, when Sappho talks about how "I" love "her," the "I" is not necessarily Sappho. Sappho wrote wedding songs, and in some instances we may understand the "I" as the bridegroom. In other poems, however, Sappho is more clearly speaking as herself, especially in the one complete poem that has been recovered, in which she addresses herself by name in the text (see chapter 10 for a full translation). In this same poem, she prays to Aphrodite to help her turn the affections of an unresponsive beloved, referred to as a female. This would appear to be clear evidence of homoerotic affections in Sappho's poetry, while other fragments relate the close affections her students had for each other (see below).
Other than Sappho's voice, our slim evidence for female homoeroticism comes from men, both in literature and in vase paintings. The problem with both sources is the matter of intention and audience: Were men simply expressing their own conceptions to other men, or were they portraying lesbianism as it actually occurred, with women in the artistic audience? Some of the more obvious portrayals of lesbian sexual encounters appear on wine cups, a form of pottery usually used only by men. Were these scenes of reality, or merely images meant to titillate a male audience? If men were using these cups in symposia, were the scenes intended to stimulate the sexual revelries associated with that forum?
In some instances, though, homoerotic images appeared on items associated with women, such as dishes or trinket boxes or oil jars. In such cases, we might understand the images as being intended for a female audience, and thus more true to their own lives. In one example from Thera on Crete, two women holding garlands stand face-to-face, one stroking the chin of the other. The proximity of their bodies and the affection portrayed in the scene strongly suggest a romantic encounter. Likewise, a Black Figure lekythos (small oil jug) from Athens shows two women sharing a shawl or mantle. Such imagery, for both
Females and males, is generally symbolic of erotic contact in Greek iconography (Rabinowitz 2002, passim).
From both Ionic (Athens) and Doric (Thera) regions, then, we have imagery that presents female homoerotic encounters. The literary evidence of such encounters is more sparse. From Athens, Aristophanes shows a group of Athenian women fondling the Spartan woman Lampito in his play Lysistrata. In Sparta, Plutarch, in his Life of Lycurgus, reports that women often maintained erotic relations with girls (perhaps following the model of the older erastes/younger eromenos among the men). The choral hymns composed by Alcman (see chapter 10) for Spartan girls make references to their love for exemplary older girls, possibly a reference to the homoerotic affections hinted at in Sappho's poetry.
Bisexuality. It appears the ancient Greeks went through phases of sexual orientation, being more homoerotic in adolescence and more heteroerotic in adulthood. When boys and girls were separated during childhood and adolescence, it was customary for them to form romantic and sexual relationships with members of their own sex. Societies, however, cannot perpetuate themselves without heterosexual unions, so all societies have to inculcate to some degree heterosexual inclinations in their members. In Greece, marriage was a heterosexual union existing for the creation of children (see above). Children would therefore go from their adolescent homosexual relationships to marital (and otherwise) heterosexual relationships. Such a transition may have been somewhat traumatic. As stated above, Spartan brides dressed as boys on their wedding nights, possibly to make their grooms feel more at ease, the grooms perhaps being used to sexual encounters with other males. Much literature (Boedeker 1974, 85-91) refers to girls being raped or seized out of the allfemale chorus by males (all over Greece), thus being brutally ripped out of the "safe" female environment to be incorporated into the harsher world of heterosexual intercourse. Sappho's poetry reveals some of this anxiety on the part of young brides. In a poem about a departed friend, who probably left Sappho's "school" upon her marriage, Sappho wrote (fr. 83):
[... ]
I truly wish to die.
She left me crying
Very much, and she said to me,
"We know what awful things we suffer, Sappho, as unwillingly I leave you behind." And I replied to her,
"Go in joy and remember me, for you know how we are fettered who cannot go with you.
But I want you to remember, if you forget, how many sweet and lovely things we shared, how many garlands of violets
And roses you wove sitting by me;
How many necklaces
Twined about your soft neck
Were made of lovely flowers,
And you anointed your fair-tressed head
With copious, regal myrrh oil;
And lying on soft beds girls
With all they most wished for beside them.”
"All they most wished for” was probably the other girls, whose company and affections they lost upon their (unwilling) marriages to men. Other poems of Sappho recount the fear of defloration, and men's sexual ineptitude in general.
So it seems that there were different phases of homosexuality and heterosexuality in Greek society. These divisions were certainly not concrete, and both continuously influenced the lives of most Greeks. Sappho's daughter complains that she cannot weave, so overwhelmed is she for love of a boy. In Athens, the wealthy man Timarchus was brought to trial for prostituting himself to other men, mainly so he could afford female prostitutes for himself (see chapter 7).
World History
